Duke-ND Thoughts

12:42: Hammond and Hayden just called the Irish and Blue Devils evenly matched. I'm giggling like a schoolgirl. I also learned that one of Duke's WRs, Eron Bailey, has six siblings whose names begin with the letter E. "Egads!"

12:45: Maher McCheese: "Charlie Weis in HD. You can see all of his 23 necks." He's now insisting that his beard slims his chins.

12:49: And Bunny La Jolla takes a hit. I'll have to explain why Jimmy Clausen is Bunny La Jolla. Bunny La Jolla is the wife of The Big Lebowski in The Big Lebowski and played by Tara Reid. Like Jimmy, they are both blonde. They both look great at 18. They both are fun to date. But, it's a bad idea to marry either one. Both peaked as teenagers. And both will suck your dick for a thousand bucks.

12:53: Notre Dame snaps it over the punter's head, and he still manages to make a good punt with a great roll. *Sigh*

12:54: And the punter has a giant, shit-eating grin on.

12:56: Duke has five wide recievers out. And Lewis is almost sacked on an incomplete pass. Memories of my freshman year and Carl Franks's "Airborne" (a.k.a. Stillborn) offense come rushing to mind.

12:59: LPGA Championship on NBC! Yah!

1:00: And Golden Tate is abused in man-t0-man coverage against a Devil. But, he's going to win four Heismans.

1:06: Chuckles has the Irish go for it on 4th & 17. Jimbo finds a huge hole in the Duke secondary about 22 yards up. And #82 drops it. Bunny disgustingly snaps off his chinstrap. Charlie Weis has some spittle around his lips.

1:07: "Frustration on both sides of the field." Imagine how fans of these programs feel.

1:09: Not only are these teams bad, but they can't stop getting penalized. They have USC's worst characteristic and lack all of the good ones.

1:10: And Lewis slips under pressure and loses 9 yards. I'll blame Weis's groundskeeping. I'm blame it more since they're supposedly replacing the entire field for next year.

1:11: "He's got a man wide open!" And the pass misses by three yards. *Sigh*

1:12: QB slip; misses a wide open receiver; drops the snap, lineman doesn't see it, and ND recovers.

1:13: Maher McCheese: "How the fuck did we [Northwestern] lose to you guys?"

1:15: Seriously! What the fuck is that shit on the corner of Weis's mouth?

1:16: This is a running theme after we saw snot all over Weis's face in both the Navy and Air Force games.

1:16: Maher McCheese: "*snicker* John Hancock"

1:18: And the Irish get a touchdown to prevent a scoreless half, La Jolla to Grimes. Surprised it took so long for either team to score as neither defense has been able to stop teams all year.

1:22: And another fucking fumble. Goddamn that's greasy.

1:24: That's exactly what you want to do. Have the defender directly behind the receiver in the endzone.

1:26: Halftime. Not watching whatever NBC puts on.

1:52: Pulling myself back to this.

1:56: I don't see any crap on Weis's face now.

2:04: Too late. The snot is back, but Chuckles wiped.

2:08: This stupid Allstate commercial where the guy wants to call his insurance company while driving has a disclaimer "Professional stunt. Do not attempt." Does that make me and 99% of drivers with cell phones a professional stunt man?

2:16: "Jimmy Clausen has avoided four or five sacks." Great, that just shows how slow Duke's D-line is. Bunny shouldn't be proud.

2:20: Another Irish touchdown. This has been a disappointment.

2:37: Just keeping getting worse. Although apparently Trevor Laws gives the same effort on a 1-9 ND team as on a 9-1 team.

2:42: They're talking about a foundation for a national championship at Duke. Pardon me if I laugh. Of course, I would have said the same thing about Kansas two years ago. Yes, we graduate our players. Yes, they typically seem to be good people. But, if winning an NC is on par with these goals, then we're really failing. And the Devils fail to convert a 4th.

2:48: Touchdown for Carlsen. I can't believe that the Devils got blown out. I'm used to losing. Just not quite like this.

2:52: No, Charlie didn't "allude"to Carlsen's 4.0. He explicitly said it.

2:58: I could make a crack about ND's quarterback shuffle with Zbikowski in there, but it just hurts too much.

3:06: They're reviewing a catch that could lead to some points. And we get a weeping band member. I can't help but recall how mad the Notre Dame fans were when Carroll challenged a play in the game this year. He lost the challenge because NBC didn't give the refs the right angle, and it was clear that he was right. And it gets reversed here. I didn't see it. I just want points though.

3:11: Touchdown Other Guys! Dammit, even if it is 28-6, I've been waiting to say that all day.

3:14: As this game's over, I'm glad there was no onside-kick attempt.

3:15: If this guy on the show team is the best long snapper they have at Notre Dame, why isn't he the everyday long snapper?

3:16: Blue Devils 7, Irish 28. Go to hell, Carolina, go to hell!